Cross Practice update-
Week one of Cyclocross practice has come and gone and week two is now upon us. The first day of cross practice saw two crossers; your beloved host and one other intrepid soul, as well as one watcher who came just to see what all the ruckus was about (word- bring a bike yo). Hot Hot Hot is the only way to describe it. Friday was day two of the first week of Go Tri Sports Cycling cyclocross practice, this time at the West Side Aquatic Center. Pracitce started with four crossers, a mountain biker and a nice downpour. Ah, good times. The rain did nothing to dampen our spirits and a good time was had by all. A big thanks to all those who came out and decided to brave the heat and rain. Practice is on for both days this week and hopefully the temps will begin to fall again.
The courses could be best described thusly:
Hughes Middle short course - Short punchy climbs, some thick grass, some short but high speed pavement, a short run-up, multiple barriers and little to no rest.
Note: For parking at Hughes on Wed. - Use the first (lower) parking area away from the school.
Westside Long course - Both short and long climbs followed by a brutal run up then a higher speed section, and as always multiple barriers. Half and full course options.
For those of you who are going to Fletcher on Oct. 7th for the last of this season's- Wednesday's Gonna Make You Suffer(fest), this week will be a good chance to get in some last minute practice. Oh, and next Wed.'s practice is canceled but next Friday should be On On!
Cheers- Rob
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Bernard Hinault says- "Attack! It’s necessary to attack. There are not 36 solutions, just attack!"
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Monday, September 28, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
CYCLOCROSS PRACTICE
CYCLOCROSS BABY!
Cold weather is coming and you know what that means - It's time for Cyclocross!
What: Cyclocross - Hup Hup Buttercup! Mountain bikes OK - No bar ends
When\Where: Starting September 21, 2009 Wednesdays -
Short Course - 5:30pm - Hughes Middle School Downtown\Augusta road area
Friday Night Lights - Long Course - 5:30pm - West Side Aquatic Center
Who: Hosted by the Go Tri Sports Cycling Team : Rob Crouch
Why: - Stay in shape through the winter
- Meet fellow cyclists
- Pratice cyclocross techniques and bike handeling
- Get your Hup Hup ON!
Other:
- We'll provide the barriers - you provide the will.
- Camaraderie is first and formost, the more the merrier
- This is practice, very low key, very low budget
- I may change the dates if there are conflicts
- Unless there is a full on boomer, I will hopefully be there
- Emphasis will be on barriers, run-ups, and portaging
- Suggestions are welcome and encouraged
- Beers at Barleys afterword is a possibility
Cold weather is coming and you know what that means - It's time for Cyclocross!
What: Cyclocross - Hup Hup Buttercup! Mountain bikes OK - No bar ends
When\Where: Starting September 21, 2009 Wednesdays -
Short Course - 5:30pm - Hughes Middle School Downtown\Augusta road area
Friday Night Lights - Long Course - 5:30pm - West Side Aquatic Center
Who: Hosted by the Go Tri Sports Cycling Team : Rob Crouch
Why: - Stay in shape through the winter
- Meet fellow cyclists
- Pratice cyclocross techniques and bike handeling
- Get your Hup Hup ON!
Other:
- We'll provide the barriers - you provide the will.
- Camaraderie is first and formost, the more the merrier
- This is practice, very low key, very low budget
- I may change the dates if there are conflicts
- Unless there is a full on boomer, I will hopefully be there
- Emphasis will be on barriers, run-ups, and portaging
- Suggestions are welcome and encouraged
- Beers at Barleys afterword is a possibility
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Cross Happenings-
First things first, I have been doing exhaustive research on cross bike setup and I have been looking at running a tubeless Hutchinson’s setup. So after thinking carefully about how the Redline felt whilst racing last year I tore the Cannondale down to get some parts to make the setup as close as I wanted to my main road bike. Note to some of you locals, do your own research as no one around here seems to know dick about cross.
First up, ergo bars in, classic bend out. I am not one of those who are a fan of the classic bend and I have found this out the honest way, by riding them. So now I have the cockpit the same as the road rig with all of the same hardware but the setup is slightly different; a 1cm shorter stem, slightly higher hoods on the bars as turning the bars totally screws up the feel of the ergo drop while sprinting and cruising. The bars also ride about a half cm higher in relation to the saddle. The saddle is also a few mm shy of the road setup in relation to the BB. But in all, the setup is very close to the road bike. All of these changes were tested and tweaked to the mm for stability and control.
Next was the wheel setup. I chose the Mavic Aksium for the trial setup due to their bomb proof nature. The first setup was with the Mavic rim strips, Stan’s tape and the Stan’s rim strip, this was a no go and would not seat. The second setup was with the Mavic rim strips, velo rim strips, Stan’s tape and the Stan’s rim strip. I have heard conflicting reports of this setup but wanted to give this a try. The first tire like this seated ok, but I could tell that there might be an issue with the thicker section at the valve stem.
Note: all of this was done with a floor pump, and valve core installed.
The issue with this setup is that the increase in the bed thickness that makes a tubeless tire less likely to burp and easier to seat also inhibits the Stan’s strip from settling under the rim hook. After procuring another roll of the Stan’s yellow tape I removed everything, from the wheel and started fresh and clean. First I used the (narrow) yellow tape to build up only the center section with three plies, cutting each round of the tape at the valve hole a little shorter than the previous one and giving the tape ends a very tiny dab of glue for good measure. This was followed with two rounds of high quality electrical tape, not cut just punctured. At this point things looked very tight and clean with the center section built up nicely and the area around the valve hole not too built up and everything perfectly flat and evenly sealed. After installing the Stan’s strip and carefully pushing and pulling with an old rounded plastic tire lever, per the video on Stan’s site, the rim strip now lay perfectly around the valve hole. Remember that there is a thicker reinforcement area around the valve stem on the Stan’s rim strip, that is why (I believe) the way I did the rim taping will contribute to a safer, stronger tire bead seating area. All of this is more evident with parts in hand. After mounting the tire and giving it a quick pump I knew this was better as the tire took air on the first stroke, no seating issues, no fuss. Everything else was by the book.
Note: I did have a large hole in one tire that was missing a small chunk of rubber that would blow sealant at 45+ psi. I bought a Hutchinson tubeless patch kit but could not get the patch to sick so I just went with the glue, which seems to be just super glue. The glue seems to hold just fine on its own though.
The initial airing of this setup took 50+ psi without sealant and held air pretty well. At around twenty psi you could squeeze and twist the tire with very little air loss. The addition of sealant and the sealing procedure made this setup very tight indeed. I have been riding this setup at around 37 psi rear and 35 psi in the front with zero issues. I have also ridden the tires somewhat lower but the ride is pretty good at the higher setting. My skill level being what it is means that I have not tested very rigorously, but I am working on that.
After two weeks and about 5 rides there are still no issues. I have not done much high stress cornering but the grip level and ride quality is awesome. As my confidence and speed go up the testing will get much more serious and as I have just done my last road race of the year I am getting more focused on having fun on the cross bike. I have also been scouring the city and surrounding areas for practice cross sites and have been working on the flow of my practice course at the Caine-Halter Y. The port o’barriers are in the works and there is a chill in the morning breeze- Cross is Coming!
My oh my, the new Euro X Mag’s are out in the red and white colour combo. They would (will) look nice and tidy on the Redline. Between those brakes and the Dura Ace levers that will be on the next cross bike make-over go-round, this will save me a tick over a half pound.
First up, ergo bars in, classic bend out. I am not one of those who are a fan of the classic bend and I have found this out the honest way, by riding them. So now I have the cockpit the same as the road rig with all of the same hardware but the setup is slightly different; a 1cm shorter stem, slightly higher hoods on the bars as turning the bars totally screws up the feel of the ergo drop while sprinting and cruising. The bars also ride about a half cm higher in relation to the saddle. The saddle is also a few mm shy of the road setup in relation to the BB. But in all, the setup is very close to the road bike. All of these changes were tested and tweaked to the mm for stability and control.
Next was the wheel setup. I chose the Mavic Aksium for the trial setup due to their bomb proof nature. The first setup was with the Mavic rim strips, Stan’s tape and the Stan’s rim strip, this was a no go and would not seat. The second setup was with the Mavic rim strips, velo rim strips, Stan’s tape and the Stan’s rim strip. I have heard conflicting reports of this setup but wanted to give this a try. The first tire like this seated ok, but I could tell that there might be an issue with the thicker section at the valve stem.
Note: all of this was done with a floor pump, and valve core installed.
The issue with this setup is that the increase in the bed thickness that makes a tubeless tire less likely to burp and easier to seat also inhibits the Stan’s strip from settling under the rim hook. After procuring another roll of the Stan’s yellow tape I removed everything, from the wheel and started fresh and clean. First I used the (narrow) yellow tape to build up only the center section with three plies, cutting each round of the tape at the valve hole a little shorter than the previous one and giving the tape ends a very tiny dab of glue for good measure. This was followed with two rounds of high quality electrical tape, not cut just punctured. At this point things looked very tight and clean with the center section built up nicely and the area around the valve hole not too built up and everything perfectly flat and evenly sealed. After installing the Stan’s strip and carefully pushing and pulling with an old rounded plastic tire lever, per the video on Stan’s site, the rim strip now lay perfectly around the valve hole. Remember that there is a thicker reinforcement area around the valve stem on the Stan’s rim strip, that is why (I believe) the way I did the rim taping will contribute to a safer, stronger tire bead seating area. All of this is more evident with parts in hand. After mounting the tire and giving it a quick pump I knew this was better as the tire took air on the first stroke, no seating issues, no fuss. Everything else was by the book.
Note: I did have a large hole in one tire that was missing a small chunk of rubber that would blow sealant at 45+ psi. I bought a Hutchinson tubeless patch kit but could not get the patch to sick so I just went with the glue, which seems to be just super glue. The glue seems to hold just fine on its own though.
The initial airing of this setup took 50+ psi without sealant and held air pretty well. At around twenty psi you could squeeze and twist the tire with very little air loss. The addition of sealant and the sealing procedure made this setup very tight indeed. I have been riding this setup at around 37 psi rear and 35 psi in the front with zero issues. I have also ridden the tires somewhat lower but the ride is pretty good at the higher setting. My skill level being what it is means that I have not tested very rigorously, but I am working on that.
After two weeks and about 5 rides there are still no issues. I have not done much high stress cornering but the grip level and ride quality is awesome. As my confidence and speed go up the testing will get much more serious and as I have just done my last road race of the year I am getting more focused on having fun on the cross bike. I have also been scouring the city and surrounding areas for practice cross sites and have been working on the flow of my practice course at the Caine-Halter Y. The port o’barriers are in the works and there is a chill in the morning breeze- Cross is Coming!
My oh my, the new Euro X Mag’s are out in the red and white colour combo. They would (will) look nice and tidy on the Redline. Between those brakes and the Dura Ace levers that will be on the next cross bike make-over go-round, this will save me a tick over a half pound.
I guess the TT bike will be the forgotten child for a while.
You know I HATE to do that.
It still belies the question of weather I should do the full monty, with the Dura Ace derailleurs to go with the levers and let the TT bike get the Ultegra stuff. Or stay with durability and leave the DA derailleurs to the TT bike… Hmmmm, decisions decisions.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
THE EVIL TRAINING PARTNER'S PHRASEBOOK
Stolen from Cozy Behive:
The Evil Training Partner's Phrasebook
How to Translate Cycling's Confusing LanguageBy: Scott Martin (RoadBikeRider.Com) & Me
Cyclists are the biggest sandbags and secret evil trainers around - They'll say anything to soften you up for the kill. Don't let this trashtalking get to you.Study this handy rider's phrasebook to find out what they really mean when they say it.
"I'm out of shape."
Translation: I ride 400 miles a week and haven't missed a day since the Ford Administration. I replace my 11 tooth cog more often that you wash your shorts. My body fat percentage is lower than your mortgage rate.
"I'm not into competition. I'm just riding to stay in shape."
Translation: I will attack until you collapse in the gutter, babbling and whimpering. I will win the line sprint if I have to force you into on-coming traffic. I will crest this hill first if I have to grab your seat post and spray energy drink into your eyes.
"I'm on my beater bike."
Translation: I had this baby custom made in Tuscany using Titanium blessed by the Pope. I took it to a wind tunnel and it disappeared. It weighs less than a breath and cost more than a divorce.
"It's not that hilly."
Translation: This climb lasts longer than a presidential campaign. Be careful on the steep sections or you'll fall over - backward. You have 39x23 low gear? Here's the name of my knee surgeon.
"I rode yesterday, but it was just a charity ride."
Translation: I broke away exactly at the start point, did a 100K time trial like a mad dog, shattered all previous personal bests in the history of the event, then scrambled to the finish alone and went home...
""You're doing great."
Translation: You, lardo, I'd like to get home before midnight. This is what you get for spending the winter watching TV and eating chocolate.
"This is a no-drop ride."
Translation: I'll need an article of your clothing for the search and rescue dogs."It's not that far."Translation: Just bring your passport along."Its all downhill now!"Translation: 4000 feet of climbing later...
"I have a granny gear for the climbs today."
Translation: But I have honed my cadence to exactly 200 RPM so yes, I will be dropping you.
"All I know is to ride hard, I really don't care about weight."
Translation: The bike I'm on is currently 0.2 pounds heavier than the current lightest bike listed on the revered International Lightbikes listings. I have three other custom made all-Boron bikes stashed away in fireproof cabinets in the basement, and all their respective magnesium wheels, front and rear, are so lightweight, they have to be restrained from flying off with weights against the wall.
"I didn't do many races this season."
Translation: Instead, I did 3 double centuries all on aerobars, rode up an down Mt. Washington 4 times a week for 5 months straight, practiced time trialling till I had blood in my eyes, and frequently added a few hundred intervals on weekends as recovery rides.
"We just had a new baby, so I have lots of responsibilities getting in the way of cycling."
Translation: I ride to work and back every day, 50 miles each way so thats 100 miles per day. At night, I put the baby to sleep, help my wife go to sleep beside the baby, then take the bike out to ride all night till the morning. Next month, I plan to start my new book "Confessions of an all night rider." Oops, I'm sorry, did I just slip past your mileage goals for the month in one night?
"Its a great route, the roads are gorgeous and scenic."
Translation: 75% dirt roads with stones as big as your head, creepy houses on both your sides with ugly black barking dogs constantly on watch, two notches through the mountains that are hotspots for landslides any moment, Oh, and you can stop to rest anytime,anywhere but sorry, I'll be riding away since I can't put my training goals on hold for you for 2.5 minutes.
"C'mon , lets do an easy 1 hour spin on the bike path."
Translation: Break the speed limit, forget about brakes and scare the living shit out of poor walkers, runners and skaters on the bike path by whizzing past them at 40+ mph till your legs are numb with pain, you're foaming at the mouth like a snakebite victim, your breathing is worse than an asthmatic episode and there's a fine layer of nasal mucus all over your face.
"I'm not feeling strong today."
Translation: My cruising power output on any ride is way past what you put at red zone anaerobic threshold in your peak form, but I can hold 500 watts only for 40 minutes today as opposed to the usual 41, which could possibly make you cramp and bonk and puke before we even cross the half way point on today's ride.
"I have to take the missus out tonight and I'm not allowed to get too tired, plus I'm allowed only one hour to ride.
"Translation: Quick, what the hell are you waiting for??! Sacrifice yourself and be my lead out train for the entire ride thank you very much.
"Train hard, win easy."
Translation: You train hard, and I win easy.
The Evil Training Partner's Phrasebook
How to Translate Cycling's Confusing LanguageBy: Scott Martin (RoadBikeRider.Com) & Me
Cyclists are the biggest sandbags and secret evil trainers around - They'll say anything to soften you up for the kill. Don't let this trashtalking get to you.Study this handy rider's phrasebook to find out what they really mean when they say it.
"I'm out of shape."
Translation: I ride 400 miles a week and haven't missed a day since the Ford Administration. I replace my 11 tooth cog more often that you wash your shorts. My body fat percentage is lower than your mortgage rate.
"I'm not into competition. I'm just riding to stay in shape."
Translation: I will attack until you collapse in the gutter, babbling and whimpering. I will win the line sprint if I have to force you into on-coming traffic. I will crest this hill first if I have to grab your seat post and spray energy drink into your eyes.
"I'm on my beater bike."
Translation: I had this baby custom made in Tuscany using Titanium blessed by the Pope. I took it to a wind tunnel and it disappeared. It weighs less than a breath and cost more than a divorce.
"It's not that hilly."
Translation: This climb lasts longer than a presidential campaign. Be careful on the steep sections or you'll fall over - backward. You have 39x23 low gear? Here's the name of my knee surgeon.
"I rode yesterday, but it was just a charity ride."
Translation: I broke away exactly at the start point, did a 100K time trial like a mad dog, shattered all previous personal bests in the history of the event, then scrambled to the finish alone and went home...
""You're doing great."
Translation: You, lardo, I'd like to get home before midnight. This is what you get for spending the winter watching TV and eating chocolate.
"This is a no-drop ride."
Translation: I'll need an article of your clothing for the search and rescue dogs."It's not that far."Translation: Just bring your passport along."Its all downhill now!"Translation: 4000 feet of climbing later...
"I have a granny gear for the climbs today."
Translation: But I have honed my cadence to exactly 200 RPM so yes, I will be dropping you.
"All I know is to ride hard, I really don't care about weight."
Translation: The bike I'm on is currently 0.2 pounds heavier than the current lightest bike listed on the revered International Lightbikes listings. I have three other custom made all-Boron bikes stashed away in fireproof cabinets in the basement, and all their respective magnesium wheels, front and rear, are so lightweight, they have to be restrained from flying off with weights against the wall.
"I didn't do many races this season."
Translation: Instead, I did 3 double centuries all on aerobars, rode up an down Mt. Washington 4 times a week for 5 months straight, practiced time trialling till I had blood in my eyes, and frequently added a few hundred intervals on weekends as recovery rides.
"We just had a new baby, so I have lots of responsibilities getting in the way of cycling."
Translation: I ride to work and back every day, 50 miles each way so thats 100 miles per day. At night, I put the baby to sleep, help my wife go to sleep beside the baby, then take the bike out to ride all night till the morning. Next month, I plan to start my new book "Confessions of an all night rider." Oops, I'm sorry, did I just slip past your mileage goals for the month in one night?
"Its a great route, the roads are gorgeous and scenic."
Translation: 75% dirt roads with stones as big as your head, creepy houses on both your sides with ugly black barking dogs constantly on watch, two notches through the mountains that are hotspots for landslides any moment, Oh, and you can stop to rest anytime,anywhere but sorry, I'll be riding away since I can't put my training goals on hold for you for 2.5 minutes.
"C'mon , lets do an easy 1 hour spin on the bike path."
Translation: Break the speed limit, forget about brakes and scare the living shit out of poor walkers, runners and skaters on the bike path by whizzing past them at 40+ mph till your legs are numb with pain, you're foaming at the mouth like a snakebite victim, your breathing is worse than an asthmatic episode and there's a fine layer of nasal mucus all over your face.
"I'm not feeling strong today."
Translation: My cruising power output on any ride is way past what you put at red zone anaerobic threshold in your peak form, but I can hold 500 watts only for 40 minutes today as opposed to the usual 41, which could possibly make you cramp and bonk and puke before we even cross the half way point on today's ride.
"I have to take the missus out tonight and I'm not allowed to get too tired, plus I'm allowed only one hour to ride.
"Translation: Quick, what the hell are you waiting for??! Sacrifice yourself and be my lead out train for the entire ride thank you very much.
"Train hard, win easy."
Translation: You train hard, and I win easy.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Of Love and Liniment
I found out something about myself lately that was rather surprising, at least it was surprising to me. The one thing that truly motivates me to train and ride is my love for the bike. When I say love for the bike I mean cycling in the most general of terms. I mean, I love the history of the sport and all of its eccentricities. I love working on and especially spec’ing and building up quality bikes. I love riding my bike far and wide, fast and slow, in all kinds of terrain and conditions. And I love racing my bikes. Racing is (for now) what I feel is my ultimate expression of my love of cycling. The thought, the planning, the investments of both time and money, all for the love of the sport of bike racing.
Herself and I went down to Charleston for some crit racing over the weekend and we sure did have good time. It was especially nice to feel included and welcome in the “scene” of Upstate racers. A big thanks to all of those we hung out with….Rock on!
Speaking of Liniment…………Who likes liniment, aka leg balm, aka embrocation, BKW – et al. I have to admit I am a sucker for a good balm for the legs, and my legs seem to like it too………If you see me at the races, or around town……..Ask me about it.
Herself and I went down to Charleston for some crit racing over the weekend and we sure did have good time. It was especially nice to feel included and welcome in the “scene” of Upstate racers. A big thanks to all of those we hung out with….Rock on!
Speaking of Liniment…………Who likes liniment, aka leg balm, aka embrocation, BKW – et al. I have to admit I am a sucker for a good balm for the legs, and my legs seem to like it too………If you see me at the races, or around town……..Ask me about it.
Friday, March 20, 2009
THE OFFICIAL EURO CYCLIST CODE OF CONDUCT
Stolen from the Inter-Web:
THE OFFICIAL EURO CYCLIST CODE OF CONDUCT
********* -THE OFFICIAL EURO CYCLIST CODE OF CONDUCT- ********* Created by Dom Guiver and Mike Flavell 1. Image and style shall be your primary concern. When suffering, one must focus first on maintaining a cool, even composure, and second on performance. Winning races is an added talent, and only counts if said euro cyclist wins with appropriate style. 2. Training is based solely on feel, while racing is to be guided by sensations and instinct. The Euro Cyclist will never accept tried or tested scientific training methods. 3. You shall NEVER, under any circumstances, wear plain black spandex bibs (shorts, regardless of colour are BANNED) or any team kit containing non-prominent Logo's. Shorts will extend 55-60% of the way down the upper leg. IN NO CONDITION shall it extend any further. 4. Legs will be SHAVED year-round. ABSOLUTELY NO EXCEPTIONS. Certain hair removal creams are endorsed only on a case-by-case basis. One shall never show up to a race (large or small) with ANY AMOUNT of stubble visible on legs. 5. A prominent line where your kit ends and where your tan begins is essential to your image. Artificial tanning is BANNED. The tan SHALL reflect the level of training commitment. 6. The Socks must extend no less than 2cm below the main bulge of your calf muscle, and shall never extend further than 1cm past the primary calf muscle bulge. All socks SHALL BE WHITE in colour with prominent logo placement. 7. Cycling shoes must contain at least 80% white! The following exceptions apply… i) Colours combinations such as world cup stripes, or Olympic gold where title has been EARNED. ii) Shoes which are custom-made for specific riders by companies endorsed by this group. These shoes will be accessible to the particular cyclist only, and shall follow the preceding rules. 8. If white cycling shoes are not available where you reside, white booties with prominent logos shall always be worn. When booties are worn, socks should protrude approximately 7 centimetres above the ankle, and shall always protrude at least 1.5cm from any booties worn. 9. Your bike frame must contain 2-4 colours IN ADDITION TO WHITE. All colours are acceptable as long as they combine tastefully. In addition to this, wheel selection must also match frame and fork. 10. You shall race only on Bora’s or Lightweights. Fulcrum Racing One, Corima Aero+ or Zipp (404’s or 202’s) wheelsets are considered stylish enough to be used as training wheels ONLY. Regardless, Ceramic bearings shall be used at all times on both training and race bikes. 11. ALL wheels shall be equipped with tubulars, regardless of your ability in gluing them. 12. Ridiculously stylish eye wear (see endorsed products list) is to be worn at all time without exception. 13. Hair shall be kept neatly short, and matching helmet shall be worn (again with prominent logo placement). Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES shall a clashing helmet colour be worn with your euro kit. 14. In RARE cases, it has been deemed acceptable to have long hair. In this event, hair shall be neatly slicked back in maximum euro-styling, and helmet SHALL NOT be worn. It is IMPERATIVE rule 12 is followed in these special cases. 15. When riding, sans helmet (with short hair), a team issue cycling cap (white in colour), shall be worn. The bill shall remain in the downward position at all times. Cycling cap can be worn forwards or backwards to coincide with specifics of current hairstyle. During spring training, cycling toques WILL be worn at all time in place of caps. 16. Kits will always be freshly washed, and one shall ALWAYS have applied a subtle quantity of eau de toilette (cologne). It is, AT ALL TIMES, FORBIDDEN to ride in an unwashed kit, as it is extremely detrimental to your image. 17. Saddles shall be white in colour only and will be manufactured in Italy or France. Exceptions shall be made in the following cases… i) Saddles containing WorldCup Stripes or Olympic Gold when EARNED ii) Italian Flag colour combo when rider is ITALIAN (born in Italy) 18. Handlebar tape is required to be cork as well as being WHITE IN COLOUR. Bar tape will be kept in pristine white condition. This state shall be achieved either through daily cleansing or frequent replacement. These jobs will NEVER be performed by the cyclist as you must maintain your image. 19. All stems must be a minimum of 120mm and a rise of no higher than -10 degrees. Stems shall be positioned no more than 0.5cm above the top of the headtube. ALL stems shall ALWAYS be oversized, made out of ALUMINUM, and airbrushed in kit/frame colours. 20. A rider will ALWAYS have liniment applied to his legs before appearing in public. 21. Facial hair will be restricted to (at maximum) a goatee, and even this is discouraged. Moustaches, beards, or any combination thereof are EXPRESSLY PROHIBITED in all instances. Stubble is, however, advisable in virtually ALL euro-situations. It is important to note: this DOES NOT apply to the legs! 22. Campagnolo shall be THE ONLY acceptable componentry and is hereby deemed superior to ANY Shimano product in ALL circumstances. You are expected to have nothing less than an ENTIRE campy grouppo. Crank substitutions are NOT permitted. There is a case by case exception for SRAM RED. 23. You shall NEVER, under any circumstances, acknowledge the presence of a cyclist riding a bike costing less than €2000 in a public place. This could be severely detrimental to your image. 24. You shall NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, associate with triathletes. It is FORBIDDEN to have any number inked onto your body before a race. 25. Any physical activity, other than cycling, is STRONGLY FROWNED UPON. This includes any form of running or swimming and their derivatives (this includes walking). The ONLY TWO other sports with a recognized degree of euro are Cross Country skiing, and long track speed skating. 26. MTB gloves are FORBIDDEN in all instances. Cycling gloves will be slick, white (in accordance with kit), and have minimal padding. Padding will be beige or white in colour. Wearing NO GLOVES is entirely acceptable and encouraged. In the case where said euro cyclist is wearing a leader’s jersey, special gloves will be made to match the colour of the jersey while blending the team kit colours simultaneously. 27. In a circumstance where any cyclist (or triathlete) ever displays aggression or disrespect towards you, you are required to ride up uncomfortably close and slap them in the face with your team issue gloves. 28. In the event a motorist disturbs your ride, you shall proceed to ride up beside the car, form a clenched fist and bang the boot of the car while doing your best attempt to sound irritated in Italian. Wild arm/head movements are strongly encouraged to enhance the apparent rage. 29. you shall NEVER rearrange your package while riding. Adjustments regarding seating/hanging comfort are to be done in private in order to preserve image. 30. ABSOLUTELY NO FORM of seatbag, frame pump, mud guard or mirror shall come within 2 meters of your bike. 31. Gearing is restricted to a titanium Campy Record 11-23 cassette with a ABSOLUTE MINIMUM of 42-53 up front. You shall never be seen pedaling at a cadence over 90rpm in case it detracts from your calm/smooth factor. The use of 25t cog is acceptable in special training circumstances. 32. ALL BIKES shall feature personalized nameplates next to your home country’s flag located on the top-tube within 10 cm seat-tube ON ONE SIDE ONLY. 33. Pedals MUST be either Look or Time. No other pedals are to be considered. (as always, ANY form of Shimano product is STRICTLY FORBIDDEN). 34. Coffee is a necessity and as such must be consumed strong (ie. espresso) on a patio in Italy in full kit, it shall be drunk black. Sugar is STRONGLY FROWNED UPON. The only milk present shall appear frothed on top (if at all). 35. All podium shots (pictures) shall be taken while wearing your team kit and appropriately matching casual euro shoes (such as puma's). Socks shall remain within the guidelines above. You are expected to display an appropriate degree of bulge while receiving kisses/trophy. 36. All pre and post-race activity will be conducted under a gazebo (this includes massage, interviews, and looking fantastic) leaving you in reasonable distance of the Euro-sun to top up your enviable tanlines or pose for photo’s. 37. Post-race, you shall be tied to their mobile phone, receiving endless calls from your attractive euro-girlfriend or important ad executives concerning modeling contracts. This will be done under the protection of the post race gazebo. 38. Team bikes will be built up so that they violate the UCI weight limit, in order that weights might be attached to the frame to demonstrate its superiority and lightness. 39. Motivational music during training shall consist of late 90s house or deep-trance hard-style German techno hereby known as 'euro beats'. NO EXCEPTIONS. 40. Naked black ALL CARBON water bottle cages (manufactured by ELITE CAGES) will be used on ALL BIKES. Exceptions include…. i) Special edition 24k gold cages are acceptable in certain cases such as photo shoots, prologues or where colour coordination dictates. Ex. Gold Cage with Olympic Gold/white team kit. 41. Water Bottles shall be referred to solely as "Bidon's" and shall have a volume NOT EXCEEDING 500ml. Bidon's will always be matching of team/kit colours. It is NOT ACCEPTABLE in ANY CIRCUMSTANCE to leave bidon's on bike more than 10 minutes post ride OR while transporting bikes via bike rack. 42. A gold pendant on a very long, thin chain bearing some form of religious icon is STRONGLY recommended for mountain races. 43. While soloing in for a victory, you will ensure your jersey is FULLY ZIPPED and ALLIGNED, so all title sponsors are clearly visible. You shall then smile and flex your arms while pointing skywards. The projection of ones fatigue is EXPLICITLY FORBIDDEN IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES. 44. When appearing in a photo spread for sponsor’s products, you have the option of appearing fully nude, in your team kit, or in full Brioni 3 piece suits (nothing else). Smiling is prohibited in these instances. 45. When appearing in documentaries, you must be seen walking around the hotel in your kit at all times. It is also recommended that you constantly be eating something in front of the cameras. 46. When asked "how are you?" while riding you must proceed with one of the following... -Complain about coming off a sickness. - Explain you're peaking for bigger races later in the season - Mention that this is a "recovery ride" -That you are on the tail end of your daily 6 hour training ride 47. If you feel the urge to relieve yourself during a race, you shall gracefully meander to the back of the pack, seat yourself sideways on his saddle, and pee into the sunflowers. It is your duty to ensure that no camera crew catches the act, for it could be detrimental to your image. Under no circumstances shall you dismount from his bike to urinate. 48. When climbing anything with a gradient above 20% and lasting over 8 kilometers, you are required to fully unzip your jersey and let it flutter freely in the wind. 49. When dropping out of a race, you shall avoid the embarrassment of entering the official broomwagon and will instead wait for the team vehicle. When asked the reason for dropping out, you shall cite mechanical problems or oncoming sickness as the reason to avoid any bad speculation in relation to your fitness. 50. If in doubt, the euro cyclist shall mention in an interview that his pollen allergies are acting up, and that he’s not sure that he’ll win the Giro this year. In this situation, remember to note that the sensations are otherwise good, and that eventually you’ll win a beautiful stage. 51. Team-building motivational camps will be held annually in the off-season. These are to place team members in as ridiculous a setting as possible. Photos will be widely reproduced to demonstrate team cohesion. 52. During the pre-race medical checks, star riders of each team are STRONGLY ADVISED to play doctor with each other while shirtless. Photos taken must strive to be as HOMEROTIC AS POSSIBLE. 53. In order to avoid the harsh European winter, you shall: i)flee to the warmer climes of Mallorca/South Africa/Canary Islands/etc. ii)“train the mind, body and soul” with Kreitler brand rollers 54. In the event of a crash, no matter how badly you have injured yourself, you shall proceed to mummify yourself with fishnet gauze. The act of gauzing oneself is looked upon with respect by other Euro Cyclists because it is a statement of commitment and strength of character to continue racing when injured. White Gauze is the norm, but world cup striped gauze and or national colors may be worn on select occasions depending on the rider.
THE OFFICIAL EURO CYCLIST CODE OF CONDUCT
********* -THE OFFICIAL EURO CYCLIST CODE OF CONDUCT- ********* Created by Dom Guiver and Mike Flavell 1. Image and style shall be your primary concern. When suffering, one must focus first on maintaining a cool, even composure, and second on performance. Winning races is an added talent, and only counts if said euro cyclist wins with appropriate style. 2. Training is based solely on feel, while racing is to be guided by sensations and instinct. The Euro Cyclist will never accept tried or tested scientific training methods. 3. You shall NEVER, under any circumstances, wear plain black spandex bibs (shorts, regardless of colour are BANNED) or any team kit containing non-prominent Logo's. Shorts will extend 55-60% of the way down the upper leg. IN NO CONDITION shall it extend any further. 4. Legs will be SHAVED year-round. ABSOLUTELY NO EXCEPTIONS. Certain hair removal creams are endorsed only on a case-by-case basis. One shall never show up to a race (large or small) with ANY AMOUNT of stubble visible on legs. 5. A prominent line where your kit ends and where your tan begins is essential to your image. Artificial tanning is BANNED. The tan SHALL reflect the level of training commitment. 6. The Socks must extend no less than 2cm below the main bulge of your calf muscle, and shall never extend further than 1cm past the primary calf muscle bulge. All socks SHALL BE WHITE in colour with prominent logo placement. 7. Cycling shoes must contain at least 80% white! The following exceptions apply… i) Colours combinations such as world cup stripes, or Olympic gold where title has been EARNED. ii) Shoes which are custom-made for specific riders by companies endorsed by this group. These shoes will be accessible to the particular cyclist only, and shall follow the preceding rules. 8. If white cycling shoes are not available where you reside, white booties with prominent logos shall always be worn. When booties are worn, socks should protrude approximately 7 centimetres above the ankle, and shall always protrude at least 1.5cm from any booties worn. 9. Your bike frame must contain 2-4 colours IN ADDITION TO WHITE. All colours are acceptable as long as they combine tastefully. In addition to this, wheel selection must also match frame and fork. 10. You shall race only on Bora’s or Lightweights. Fulcrum Racing One, Corima Aero+ or Zipp (404’s or 202’s) wheelsets are considered stylish enough to be used as training wheels ONLY. Regardless, Ceramic bearings shall be used at all times on both training and race bikes. 11. ALL wheels shall be equipped with tubulars, regardless of your ability in gluing them. 12. Ridiculously stylish eye wear (see endorsed products list) is to be worn at all time without exception. 13. Hair shall be kept neatly short, and matching helmet shall be worn (again with prominent logo placement). Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES shall a clashing helmet colour be worn with your euro kit. 14. In RARE cases, it has been deemed acceptable to have long hair. In this event, hair shall be neatly slicked back in maximum euro-styling, and helmet SHALL NOT be worn. It is IMPERATIVE rule 12 is followed in these special cases. 15. When riding, sans helmet (with short hair), a team issue cycling cap (white in colour), shall be worn. The bill shall remain in the downward position at all times. Cycling cap can be worn forwards or backwards to coincide with specifics of current hairstyle. During spring training, cycling toques WILL be worn at all time in place of caps. 16. Kits will always be freshly washed, and one shall ALWAYS have applied a subtle quantity of eau de toilette (cologne). It is, AT ALL TIMES, FORBIDDEN to ride in an unwashed kit, as it is extremely detrimental to your image. 17. Saddles shall be white in colour only and will be manufactured in Italy or France. Exceptions shall be made in the following cases… i) Saddles containing WorldCup Stripes or Olympic Gold when EARNED ii) Italian Flag colour combo when rider is ITALIAN (born in Italy) 18. Handlebar tape is required to be cork as well as being WHITE IN COLOUR. Bar tape will be kept in pristine white condition. This state shall be achieved either through daily cleansing or frequent replacement. These jobs will NEVER be performed by the cyclist as you must maintain your image. 19. All stems must be a minimum of 120mm and a rise of no higher than -10 degrees. Stems shall be positioned no more than 0.5cm above the top of the headtube. ALL stems shall ALWAYS be oversized, made out of ALUMINUM, and airbrushed in kit/frame colours. 20. A rider will ALWAYS have liniment applied to his legs before appearing in public. 21. Facial hair will be restricted to (at maximum) a goatee, and even this is discouraged. Moustaches, beards, or any combination thereof are EXPRESSLY PROHIBITED in all instances. Stubble is, however, advisable in virtually ALL euro-situations. It is important to note: this DOES NOT apply to the legs! 22. Campagnolo shall be THE ONLY acceptable componentry and is hereby deemed superior to ANY Shimano product in ALL circumstances. You are expected to have nothing less than an ENTIRE campy grouppo. Crank substitutions are NOT permitted. There is a case by case exception for SRAM RED. 23. You shall NEVER, under any circumstances, acknowledge the presence of a cyclist riding a bike costing less than €2000 in a public place. This could be severely detrimental to your image. 24. You shall NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, associate with triathletes. It is FORBIDDEN to have any number inked onto your body before a race. 25. Any physical activity, other than cycling, is STRONGLY FROWNED UPON. This includes any form of running or swimming and their derivatives (this includes walking). The ONLY TWO other sports with a recognized degree of euro are Cross Country skiing, and long track speed skating. 26. MTB gloves are FORBIDDEN in all instances. Cycling gloves will be slick, white (in accordance with kit), and have minimal padding. Padding will be beige or white in colour. Wearing NO GLOVES is entirely acceptable and encouraged. In the case where said euro cyclist is wearing a leader’s jersey, special gloves will be made to match the colour of the jersey while blending the team kit colours simultaneously. 27. In a circumstance where any cyclist (or triathlete) ever displays aggression or disrespect towards you, you are required to ride up uncomfortably close and slap them in the face with your team issue gloves. 28. In the event a motorist disturbs your ride, you shall proceed to ride up beside the car, form a clenched fist and bang the boot of the car while doing your best attempt to sound irritated in Italian. Wild arm/head movements are strongly encouraged to enhance the apparent rage. 29. you shall NEVER rearrange your package while riding. Adjustments regarding seating/hanging comfort are to be done in private in order to preserve image. 30. ABSOLUTELY NO FORM of seatbag, frame pump, mud guard or mirror shall come within 2 meters of your bike. 31. Gearing is restricted to a titanium Campy Record 11-23 cassette with a ABSOLUTE MINIMUM of 42-53 up front. You shall never be seen pedaling at a cadence over 90rpm in case it detracts from your calm/smooth factor. The use of 25t cog is acceptable in special training circumstances. 32. ALL BIKES shall feature personalized nameplates next to your home country’s flag located on the top-tube within 10 cm seat-tube ON ONE SIDE ONLY. 33. Pedals MUST be either Look or Time. No other pedals are to be considered. (as always, ANY form of Shimano product is STRICTLY FORBIDDEN). 34. Coffee is a necessity and as such must be consumed strong (ie. espresso) on a patio in Italy in full kit, it shall be drunk black. Sugar is STRONGLY FROWNED UPON. The only milk present shall appear frothed on top (if at all). 35. All podium shots (pictures) shall be taken while wearing your team kit and appropriately matching casual euro shoes (such as puma's). Socks shall remain within the guidelines above. You are expected to display an appropriate degree of bulge while receiving kisses/trophy. 36. All pre and post-race activity will be conducted under a gazebo (this includes massage, interviews, and looking fantastic) leaving you in reasonable distance of the Euro-sun to top up your enviable tanlines or pose for photo’s. 37. Post-race, you shall be tied to their mobile phone, receiving endless calls from your attractive euro-girlfriend or important ad executives concerning modeling contracts. This will be done under the protection of the post race gazebo. 38. Team bikes will be built up so that they violate the UCI weight limit, in order that weights might be attached to the frame to demonstrate its superiority and lightness. 39. Motivational music during training shall consist of late 90s house or deep-trance hard-style German techno hereby known as 'euro beats'. NO EXCEPTIONS. 40. Naked black ALL CARBON water bottle cages (manufactured by ELITE CAGES) will be used on ALL BIKES. Exceptions include…. i) Special edition 24k gold cages are acceptable in certain cases such as photo shoots, prologues or where colour coordination dictates. Ex. Gold Cage with Olympic Gold/white team kit. 41. Water Bottles shall be referred to solely as "Bidon's" and shall have a volume NOT EXCEEDING 500ml. Bidon's will always be matching of team/kit colours. It is NOT ACCEPTABLE in ANY CIRCUMSTANCE to leave bidon's on bike more than 10 minutes post ride OR while transporting bikes via bike rack. 42. A gold pendant on a very long, thin chain bearing some form of religious icon is STRONGLY recommended for mountain races. 43. While soloing in for a victory, you will ensure your jersey is FULLY ZIPPED and ALLIGNED, so all title sponsors are clearly visible. You shall then smile and flex your arms while pointing skywards. The projection of ones fatigue is EXPLICITLY FORBIDDEN IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES. 44. When appearing in a photo spread for sponsor’s products, you have the option of appearing fully nude, in your team kit, or in full Brioni 3 piece suits (nothing else). Smiling is prohibited in these instances. 45. When appearing in documentaries, you must be seen walking around the hotel in your kit at all times. It is also recommended that you constantly be eating something in front of the cameras. 46. When asked "how are you?" while riding you must proceed with one of the following... -Complain about coming off a sickness. - Explain you're peaking for bigger races later in the season - Mention that this is a "recovery ride" -That you are on the tail end of your daily 6 hour training ride 47. If you feel the urge to relieve yourself during a race, you shall gracefully meander to the back of the pack, seat yourself sideways on his saddle, and pee into the sunflowers. It is your duty to ensure that no camera crew catches the act, for it could be detrimental to your image. Under no circumstances shall you dismount from his bike to urinate. 48. When climbing anything with a gradient above 20% and lasting over 8 kilometers, you are required to fully unzip your jersey and let it flutter freely in the wind. 49. When dropping out of a race, you shall avoid the embarrassment of entering the official broomwagon and will instead wait for the team vehicle. When asked the reason for dropping out, you shall cite mechanical problems or oncoming sickness as the reason to avoid any bad speculation in relation to your fitness. 50. If in doubt, the euro cyclist shall mention in an interview that his pollen allergies are acting up, and that he’s not sure that he’ll win the Giro this year. In this situation, remember to note that the sensations are otherwise good, and that eventually you’ll win a beautiful stage. 51. Team-building motivational camps will be held annually in the off-season. These are to place team members in as ridiculous a setting as possible. Photos will be widely reproduced to demonstrate team cohesion. 52. During the pre-race medical checks, star riders of each team are STRONGLY ADVISED to play doctor with each other while shirtless. Photos taken must strive to be as HOMEROTIC AS POSSIBLE. 53. In order to avoid the harsh European winter, you shall: i)flee to the warmer climes of Mallorca/South Africa/Canary Islands/etc. ii)“train the mind, body and soul” with Kreitler brand rollers 54. In the event of a crash, no matter how badly you have injured yourself, you shall proceed to mummify yourself with fishnet gauze. The act of gauzing oneself is looked upon with respect by other Euro Cyclists because it is a statement of commitment and strength of character to continue racing when injured. White Gauze is the norm, but world cup striped gauze and or national colors may be worn on select occasions depending on the rider.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
What...............
What is it?
I have been thinking of some of the things I read about and wondering about what they mean to me, what they mean to others, and if the two are even close.
Class – What is it, do I have it, do you have it? When I see this term bandied about, I can’t help but make comparisons as to what I can see with my own eyes. Half wheelers, those who put their wheel where they shouldn’t, and those who just don’t pay attention to the situations around them. Do they have class just because they are fast? Although class seems to mean the ability to win races, I believe that it extends to other less measurable, less quantifiable standards…………
Flow – Do I have it, am I getting it, can I get it? This one is even more subjective than the first. Last night I felt “flow”. The legs were none too fresh nor strong but they seemed not to care, the attention felt focused, but the movements fluid and the feeling sublime. This, I believe, is what will pay off for me. Time spent on the bike carving turns and balancing on the pedals. Focus on the feel, the flow…………
I have been thinking of some of the things I read about and wondering about what they mean to me, what they mean to others, and if the two are even close.
Class – What is it, do I have it, do you have it? When I see this term bandied about, I can’t help but make comparisons as to what I can see with my own eyes. Half wheelers, those who put their wheel where they shouldn’t, and those who just don’t pay attention to the situations around them. Do they have class just because they are fast? Although class seems to mean the ability to win races, I believe that it extends to other less measurable, less quantifiable standards…………
Flow – Do I have it, am I getting it, can I get it? This one is even more subjective than the first. Last night I felt “flow”. The legs were none too fresh nor strong but they seemed not to care, the attention felt focused, but the movements fluid and the feeling sublime. This, I believe, is what will pay off for me. Time spent on the bike carving turns and balancing on the pedals. Focus on the feel, the flow…………
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Race Recap - Updated!
Saturday Race:
Saturday morning dawned cold and clear, twenty eight degrees was what the thermometer read at seven o’clock, but at least it was not raining. The start line brought together what I thought was an unlikely looking group for a bunch of bike racers. These were the guys that had been training all winter to whip my narrow ass? Bring it……….
The first lap was uneventful enough with only a telltale bobble here and there and my charge seemed to be enjoying him self in the pack. I was, as usual, trying to stay out of trouble and keep an eye on the half-wheelers. The top of golf course hill is its usual bitch and never fails to sift a few fatties out of the pack. Next time around I push it to the limit on the hill and I can barely hang on at the top from the effort. I did not have it in me to look back but at some point in the second lap we lost quite a few riders. Last lap of three, everyone seemed to be really solid and I was kind of hanging back getting a good look at what we had left. My teammate was also at the back, getting pinched out I am sure as everyone was jockeying for position for the upcoming finish line. I was not too concerned as things usually favour the patient, but he seemed to get agitated and was chomping at the bit to get to the front. My team mate was trying very hard to motivate the pack fodder to pick it up or let him through as most seemed to be soft pedaling, saving up I am sure. He cannot find a hole so across the yellow line he goes and everyone starts complaining and here comes the motorbike to relegate him. With the chorus of “DQ, DQ” hanging in the air I see heads lift, a bobble, and then absolute mayhem as riders slam to the ground and into each other, loudly moaning in pain. Given, I am still fairly new to bike racing but I have not seen the like of that yet, disturbing. I manage to avoid the pileup and continue towards the line, still unsure of things. I was content to soft pedal to the line but I feel someone coming in on my wheel so I stand it up a bit to hold my place 9th and my teammate took 13th.
Sunday Race:
Although I am sure people will dispute the details and make comparisons where there are none to be made, I was there. My teammate said he wanted absolution, I sad fine but wait, he said he was going from the gun, I said rock it! Or something along those lines. And so we line up and bang, off he goes. I know Al and I have seen his TT times and that boy can hammer. Behind me I hear “he will never hold that”, at least they hope. I stay towards the front and try to disrupt the chase as best I can. A lucky few go off the front in pursuit, that would be me ordinarily but not today, I have to do my job in the pack. Holy shvazoli it was windy and I was a hurting pretty bad. I sure did get the smack down for not pulling and even got the eff bomb thrown at me. So it is, I think that I did a pretty good job for my first time. I did manage a few feeble pulls on the last lap and as we were catching the race debris, the motor bike pulls up alongside me and I know what that means, a quick look back confirms, we are all that is left, four up front and six chasing. Hammering for the line I put my head down and manage to hang on for another 9th place.
Saturday morning dawned cold and clear, twenty eight degrees was what the thermometer read at seven o’clock, but at least it was not raining. The start line brought together what I thought was an unlikely looking group for a bunch of bike racers. These were the guys that had been training all winter to whip my narrow ass? Bring it……….
The first lap was uneventful enough with only a telltale bobble here and there and my charge seemed to be enjoying him self in the pack. I was, as usual, trying to stay out of trouble and keep an eye on the half-wheelers. The top of golf course hill is its usual bitch and never fails to sift a few fatties out of the pack. Next time around I push it to the limit on the hill and I can barely hang on at the top from the effort. I did not have it in me to look back but at some point in the second lap we lost quite a few riders. Last lap of three, everyone seemed to be really solid and I was kind of hanging back getting a good look at what we had left. My teammate was also at the back, getting pinched out I am sure as everyone was jockeying for position for the upcoming finish line. I was not too concerned as things usually favour the patient, but he seemed to get agitated and was chomping at the bit to get to the front. My team mate was trying very hard to motivate the pack fodder to pick it up or let him through as most seemed to be soft pedaling, saving up I am sure. He cannot find a hole so across the yellow line he goes and everyone starts complaining and here comes the motorbike to relegate him. With the chorus of “DQ, DQ” hanging in the air I see heads lift, a bobble, and then absolute mayhem as riders slam to the ground and into each other, loudly moaning in pain. Given, I am still fairly new to bike racing but I have not seen the like of that yet, disturbing. I manage to avoid the pileup and continue towards the line, still unsure of things. I was content to soft pedal to the line but I feel someone coming in on my wheel so I stand it up a bit to hold my place 9th and my teammate took 13th.
Sunday Race:
Although I am sure people will dispute the details and make comparisons where there are none to be made, I was there. My teammate said he wanted absolution, I sad fine but wait, he said he was going from the gun, I said rock it! Or something along those lines. And so we line up and bang, off he goes. I know Al and I have seen his TT times and that boy can hammer. Behind me I hear “he will never hold that”, at least they hope. I stay towards the front and try to disrupt the chase as best I can. A lucky few go off the front in pursuit, that would be me ordinarily but not today, I have to do my job in the pack. Holy shvazoli it was windy and I was a hurting pretty bad. I sure did get the smack down for not pulling and even got the eff bomb thrown at me. So it is, I think that I did a pretty good job for my first time. I did manage a few feeble pulls on the last lap and as we were catching the race debris, the motor bike pulls up alongside me and I know what that means, a quick look back confirms, we are all that is left, four up front and six chasing. Hammering for the line I put my head down and manage to hang on for another 9th place.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Great Scott! .......The Hounds are Upon Us!
How the hell did road race season get here so soon? I can only hope that some of the other Cat 5 losers (like me) have had as much fun as I have had this winter. I keep reminding myself of how long this season will be and not to get too caught up in the now of Feb., considering that I also want to do a good cross season. Saturday, all of the fruit or lack thereof will be brought to bear with the Spring Series. I have to say that I am not very ready, as I was still trying to cough up whatever is still in my lungs last night, and there is a lot of it. Tonight’s show will be Tour de Living Room brought to you by pain and suffering. Herself and I are going to be doing beyond threshold intervals…
Workout: 10 min. spin + 5 min step up + 45 min. intervals + 5 min. cool down.
Interval: Twenty second all out max with two min. rest
Let the structured workouts begin……….
Workout: 10 min. spin + 5 min step up + 45 min. intervals + 5 min. cool down.
Interval: Twenty second all out max with two min. rest
Let the structured workouts begin……….
Monday, February 9, 2009
An open post:
In the throes:
So for further clarification, I have pulled the oh so sweet Reynolds DV46C’s off of the Look and replaced them with Shimano’s cheapest (or almost cheapest) set of wheels. This is heartbreaking for me to say the least, although I know that I should just get over it. This bike just looks so bad ass with those wheels on it. Don't you think?
But I know that in the long run I need to run the crap wheels as it will have the two fold benefit of saving the good and true wheels for race day and making my legs work a bit harder to turn the heavier wheels whilst training. They do ride fine though and I look like less of a wanker riding around town. I should count myself lucky to have the dilemma of which bike to put which wheels on, worrying about gear choices and such. Hey, I’m a gear junkie and I have the credit card bills to prove it.
On Love and Labour:
Many of the people that I have told about my recent lack of training have given me that “You’re screwed - you are screwing up” look when I say that I have been “working on the garage”. So let’s clarify- By working I mean that I have completely demolished an interior and an exterior wall of the garage, re-framed them, tied everything together structurally, drilled and screwed into concrete, and framed in for a garage door, which is now in. Talk about hard work! I now have a bike shop with a garage bay!!!
I also ordered the Ultimate Pro Classic bike stand, truing stand attachment, and all the trimmings for my shop………. So very PRO.
On Training:
Yes I have also been sick, but as far as training goes I have really gone my own way. Given the extreme length of our racing season and the burned out state that I have frequently gotten into, I have not been piling on the miles but have been trying to improve my muscular power by doing shorter (2 hour) rides involving a higher degree of power and gaining extra weight that I plan on using as a buffer to burn through as the season progresses.
On Haters:
I changed the style up…….. So let the haters hate and I’ll let the deliciousness pile up! Word.
So for further clarification, I have pulled the oh so sweet Reynolds DV46C’s off of the Look and replaced them with Shimano’s cheapest (or almost cheapest) set of wheels. This is heartbreaking for me to say the least, although I know that I should just get over it. This bike just looks so bad ass with those wheels on it. Don't you think?
But I know that in the long run I need to run the crap wheels as it will have the two fold benefit of saving the good and true wheels for race day and making my legs work a bit harder to turn the heavier wheels whilst training. They do ride fine though and I look like less of a wanker riding around town. I should count myself lucky to have the dilemma of which bike to put which wheels on, worrying about gear choices and such. Hey, I’m a gear junkie and I have the credit card bills to prove it.
On Love and Labour:
Many of the people that I have told about my recent lack of training have given me that “You’re screwed - you are screwing up” look when I say that I have been “working on the garage”. So let’s clarify- By working I mean that I have completely demolished an interior and an exterior wall of the garage, re-framed them, tied everything together structurally, drilled and screwed into concrete, and framed in for a garage door, which is now in. Talk about hard work! I now have a bike shop with a garage bay!!!
I also ordered the Ultimate Pro Classic bike stand, truing stand attachment, and all the trimmings for my shop………. So very PRO.
On Training:
Yes I have also been sick, but as far as training goes I have really gone my own way. Given the extreme length of our racing season and the burned out state that I have frequently gotten into, I have not been piling on the miles but have been trying to improve my muscular power by doing shorter (2 hour) rides involving a higher degree of power and gaining extra weight that I plan on using as a buffer to burn through as the season progresses.
On Haters:
I changed the style up…….. So let the haters hate and I’ll let the deliciousness pile up! Word.
The Long Climb Back-
Yesterday I did my first ride in weeks that I would consider “hard”. Herself and I did the weekend right! On Sat. I rode an hour or so solo before we met up at the park to loosen up the legs for Sun. I still felt pretty bad and a bit feverish Sat. night so I made sure that I got my herbs before bedtime. I did manage to get the Look sorted for the crap wheels (sniff) and the BMC’s cassette changed in time for Sundays ride. Lynn has been suffering with an 11-23 and I swapped it out for a 12-25. Between the gear set change and her burgeoning fitness Ol’ Paris never stood a chance as Lynn managed to do the entire “climbing route” in style and with class to spare.
-A big Kick Ass!
Yesterday I did my first ride in weeks that I would consider “hard”. Herself and I did the weekend right! On Sat. I rode an hour or so solo before we met up at the park to loosen up the legs for Sun. I still felt pretty bad and a bit feverish Sat. night so I made sure that I got my herbs before bedtime. I did manage to get the Look sorted for the crap wheels (sniff) and the BMC’s cassette changed in time for Sundays ride. Lynn has been suffering with an 11-23 and I swapped it out for a 12-25. Between the gear set change and her burgeoning fitness Ol’ Paris never stood a chance as Lynn managed to do the entire “climbing route” in style and with class to spare.
-A big Kick Ass!
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Getting Back
First ride back:
I told Her(self) that this is why she should keep a training log. I was suffering like a dog for no reason (except that “I had been sick”). We went to the park to do some laps, all bundled up, and boy did I feel like a pile of dirty dish rags. Round and around we go and then next thing you know, She is towing my sorry ass around like nobody’s business. Just like I told her a while back, there would come a time when the stars would align and she would stick it too me……..
-And she did!
Revenge of the Nerds:
Lo how the mighty have fallen. I guess that I am getting better as I was able to give a little bit of the business to Herself in night two of the “Living Room Grand Prix”. I setup the trainers in the living room, put my homemade bootleg DVD of euro trash cross on the tele, complete with Flemish commentary, and my Bike Rock soundtrack on the stereo.
-And a good time was had by all.
I told Her(self) that this is why she should keep a training log. I was suffering like a dog for no reason (except that “I had been sick”). We went to the park to do some laps, all bundled up, and boy did I feel like a pile of dirty dish rags. Round and around we go and then next thing you know, She is towing my sorry ass around like nobody’s business. Just like I told her a while back, there would come a time when the stars would align and she would stick it too me……..
-And she did!
Revenge of the Nerds:
Lo how the mighty have fallen. I guess that I am getting better as I was able to give a little bit of the business to Herself in night two of the “Living Room Grand Prix”. I setup the trainers in the living room, put my homemade bootleg DVD of euro trash cross on the tele, complete with Flemish commentary, and my Bike Rock soundtrack on the stereo.
-And a good time was had by all.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Where have all the good times gone
So we are well into the “New Year” and where has my training gone……..In the crapper is where it has gone. For all of my posturing last season about how I was going to get a leg up on this season, I feel like I have done all of nil to prepare for it. Forget about all of the two hour night rides, I still feel like a looser for not doing the tons of base and wicked fast group rides that it seems everyone else is doing. I will have to say that my guitar playing showed some improvement though, at least for a short while.
So what have I accomplished? I demolished and rebuilt a few walls and framed in for a garage door on herself’s garage in anticipation of “the move”. Speaking of which I have been informed that if I don’t make some kind of announcement I may get flogged so here goes.
I am engaged to be married to my darling and betrothed'!!! …aka Herself, aka Slave Driver, Boss Lady, et. al……(Sorry Stu but I could not help but steal that one…….Imitation and flattery and all that jazz)
Back on topic: So after my brief stint as a carpenter I came down with the flu…Joy!
And I have been surly and sedentary ever since. But with the spring series and my eminent public humiliation on the horizon, the time is now to get off my drunken ass and “Get to it” as Aunt Bee would say.
See yah
So what have I accomplished? I demolished and rebuilt a few walls and framed in for a garage door on herself’s garage in anticipation of “the move”. Speaking of which I have been informed that if I don’t make some kind of announcement I may get flogged so here goes.
I am engaged to be married to my darling and betrothed'!!! …aka Herself, aka Slave Driver, Boss Lady, et. al……(Sorry Stu but I could not help but steal that one…….Imitation and flattery and all that jazz)
Back on topic: So after my brief stint as a carpenter I came down with the flu…Joy!
And I have been surly and sedentary ever since. But with the spring series and my eminent public humiliation on the horizon, the time is now to get off my drunken ass and “Get to it” as Aunt Bee would say.
See yah
Friday, January 2, 2009
Happy New.................yeah yeah...........Whatever.
Just kidding. I'm happy about bringing in the new year and exited about what awesome(ness) it holds. I took Herself up what I like to refer to as the "Climbing route" of Paris Mountain on the first day of the new year. After the first "rise" I was debating the merits of doing the full monty as it were, but then thought , eff it. Nothing like a little suffering (or alot) to start the new year off right.....Right? So up we go and all was well but dropping down the other side was a bear to say the least. The temperature was dropping and we were dropping down the hill for 10 minutes, getting chilled like shrimp on ice, never to recover. I seems like often times when coming back into town after coming down the mountain and following the roads along the river, it just gets colder and colder. We did make it home though, just at dark and no worse for wear, after some hot food, hot chocolate and hot showers. Ahhhhhhhhhh..............
Just kidding. I'm happy about bringing in the new year and exited about what awesome(ness) it holds. I took Herself up what I like to refer to as the "Climbing route" of Paris Mountain on the first day of the new year. After the first "rise" I was debating the merits of doing the full monty as it were, but then thought , eff it. Nothing like a little suffering (or alot) to start the new year off right.....Right? So up we go and all was well but dropping down the other side was a bear to say the least. The temperature was dropping and we were dropping down the hill for 10 minutes, getting chilled like shrimp on ice, never to recover. I seems like often times when coming back into town after coming down the mountain and following the roads along the river, it just gets colder and colder. We did make it home though, just at dark and no worse for wear, after some hot food, hot chocolate and hot showers. Ahhhhhhhhhh..............
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